Here Now
by Everything In Its Right Place
Summary: The walk back to Konoha after three years of being away was the longest walk of Sasuke's life. The story of life after his return. Eventual SasuNaruNaruSasu
1. Chapter 1

Hello everybody! This is my very first SasukexNaruto story. Though I'm an old hat at fanfiction. I don't know when it happened or why, but I really can't see them with anyone but each other. I've been pretty into (read obbsessed) with Naruto for a while now and I felt like it was time to try my hand at a fanfiction. I miss writing all the time. Maybe this will spur me back into it. This story was suppossed to be a one shot but is now thirteen pages long with no end in sight and I thought I would split it up a little if only to find someone to beta for me. I have a regular beta but she doesn't feel comfortable with yaoi so I didn't ask her to be involved with this one. If anyone out there is interested in helping me out, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE let me know. I will never be satisfied with my own work, part of the reason it takes me forever to write these things is because I go over them like 200 times before I will even deem them acceptable, so I would just feel better about my stories if I had someone to look them over with me before I post them. Anyway, I'm thinking that this will be a three or four parter at the very most. I hope that you enjoy it.

**Warning: **This story is set after Sasuke leaves Konoha for Orochimaru. There is some nasty language. There will eventually be a malexmale relationship, but not until the last chapter. If you don't like that kind of stuff, I advise you not to read it.

**Disclaimer:** Naruto and all of it's characters and settings are not my property

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The walk back to Konoha after being gone for three years was the longest walk of Sasuke's life. He felt like there were two huge weights on his shoulders holding him down and slowing his normally quick and agile movements. One weight he invisioned as having the words _I Am A Traitor To My Village _emblazoned on the side. This weight was part guilt but mainly apprehension. Would they even let him back in when he got there? Would his plan of blaming it on himself being thirteen and stupid work? Would they believe he'd actually matured and developed enough to understand that he'd done a bad bad thing and wouldn't ever do it again? He could see himself being bodily thrown in jail by his former comrades, and the thought was upsetting. He bore it though because he'd decided before he set out on his journey back to the Leaf Village that he deserved whatever it was they were going to do to him. He deserved it and much more because of the second weight he carried. This weight was bigger and heavier than the other and proclaimed_ I Almost Killed My Only Friend_. It was made up almost entirely of remorse. The Uchiha usually wasn't sorry about anything. He didn't really care how other people saw him. He had a reason for every single thing he did, and up until he decided to leave Orochimaru's corpse and the power of the Cursed Seal behind him, it had been enough that he had never truly felt bad about any of his actions. But this was different. He had only had one _real_ friend in his entire life. There was only one person that he had shared any kind of a true consensual emotional bond with, and his hand still tingled terribly where it had been in his chest whenever the dark haired boy thought about it. Naruto had nearly _died_. It would have only taken a little more, and Naruto would have been gone. There would have been no more stupid jokes, no more insulting nicknames, no more of Konoha's Ninja Best At Surprising People. No Naruto. And it would have been Sasuke's fault. It was the fact that he had _almost_ killed him that made it anywhere close to bearable. He would not admit to himself that he was afraid. Naruto's possible reaction did not scare him regardless of how many times he saw imagined hatred in the blond's eyes after running through yet another feasible outcome. Those weights along with the one around his neck that he'd gotten used to, _I Still Haven't Avenged My Clan By Killing My Insane Brother, _made him trudge along at a very un-ninja like pace. Therefore, it took him eight whole days to reach the village including the one he'd spent lying on a lake bed, the weights moved to his chest, watching the sun rise, travel across the sky, and set before watching the moon do the same. It was mid-afternoon when he arrived in front of the large wooden gates and he felt a small amount of Uchiha pride welling up inside him. He had decided that he was returning, and though he had stopped for a while, after leaving that compound he never once looked back.

ANBU greeted him after a few moments as he expected, and he was led through town to the Hokage's office after he told them his reasons for being there. _I'm back._ He was again at his normal speed, refusing to show any outward signs of distress, and ignored the whispers of the villagers, the squeals of delight from what was left of his fan club, and the angry mutterings of some ninjas. He had prepared himself for this. It was in most of his senarios. He was surprised that the guards allowed him to walk between them without holding on to him and took it as a fairly positive sign. When an Uchiha said something, it was the truth. Regardless of whether it was good or bad, it was said with the same conviction that made people believe it. He was glad that he had predicted that he might see Kakashi in the tower. He was lounging against a wall reading a small orange book. Sasuke watched as the Copy Nin looked up and held his eye as he passed by. _Yes, I'm walking to the Hokage's office. Make of it what you will. _He had been ready for the return look. _You almost killed your only friend._ And though the weight was suddenly heavier, Sasuke did not break his stride. He knew what was coming. He was ready with an explanation. Whatever happened after that was beyond his control. When he stopped in front of the Hokage's door, the moment before an ANBU with a wolf mask knocked on it, he heard something that he had not planned for.

"But Tsunade-bachan..."

And Sasuke froze. He had expected to see Naruto, he wasn't stupid. Probably not before meeting the Hokage, but certainly soon after. He wouldn't even have to go looking. The blond would hear of his return and come looking for him, most likely to kick his ass. That was alright. He could do that. He _wanted_ Naruto to beat the snot out of him because he deserved it, and he didn't want to apologize. The thought of it was acrid in his mouth. _So... I'm sorry._ It was inadequate and stupid. But Naruto was inside. He was going to see him plead his case. There was no way the blond would leave. How was he supposed to do this when Naruto was there? Naruto who he almost _murdered_.

"Shut up, brat! Come in!"

The door swung open, and there he was leaning over Tsunade's desk. A million things were running through Sasuke's head as he looked at his tensed back. _He's right there. I can't run away from this. He's gotten taller. His hair has grown out a little. What will he say? He changed his stupid outfit. Where is that lame sling shot thing? What is his obsession with orange? He's right there. Does he know it's me? Like he'd forget my chakra. He's stronger. He has a lot more muscle. Why isn't he breathing? Why am I not breathing? What expression is he wearing? He hates me. He must. Does he have a scar? Will my fingers match up to it? He's right there! Say something!_ The silence was palatable. The ANBU were staring at Tsunade. She was slack jawed and gaping at Sasuke. Sasuke had slightly widened eyes on Naruto, who continued to lean over the desk. It was only a few seconds, but it felt like much much longer. Then something that hadn't even crossed Sasuke's mind happened. Naruto looked over his shoulder with the happiest smile the dark haired boy had ever seen.

"Took you long enough, Sasuke-teme."

"Not everyone is on your time table, dobe." It came without even thinking. It was as natural as breathing, and Sasuke felt his weights drop to the floor.

"Didn't I tell you he'd come back, ya old hag?" he threw out casually, still smiling. Tsunade continued open mouthed staring.

"Yeah, you did."

And just like that, the hardest part was over. Naruto had said he would come back, and he did. He was surprised at the amount of lienency he got. He could still be a ninja, even though he was technically only a gennin until he finished the exams. There was to be a jounin stationed inside the Uchiha complex at all times for at least three years. It irked him, but it was only three years. That meant when he was nineteen and had proven himself a faithful member of the village with no intention of sneaking off to gain more power by serving enemies and turning against teammates, he could lead the normal ninja life he'd always wanted. And it seemed Naruto had forgiven him before he'd even gotten home. Things fell into a regular rhythm and soon he was teamed up with a jounin named Kanami, whom he was sure had passed her jounin exam through some kind of a fluke, and two young teammates. The boy, Daisuke, reminded him of a young Hinata with red hair and a constantly runny nose. His cheeks were almost continually tinted pink, and Sasuke was miffed at how he seemed painfully shy and nervous. The girl, Kaori, had two long braids of dark brown hair and was just as wild and overwhelmingly annoying as Naruto had been when he was her age. Plus she, like most other females in Konoha including his instructor try as she might to hide it, had a crush on Sasuke. She constantly clung to him and loudly announced her intentions at regular intervals. _I'm gonna kiss you so good, you just wait._ And the only reason the dark-haired teen didn't beat the crap out of her wasn't because she was a thirteen year-old girl but because she really did remind him of his blue-eyed friend. Sasuke couldn't hate her because when she stuck out her tongue at him, he imagined the whisker like scars and a shock of yellow. He could never hate the memories of his happier days. Of the time before he left. That did not stop him from sneering, making snide comments, or generally being an asshole though. He was Uchiha Sasuke. There were some things that would never change.

Every Tuesday and Friday at 2pm, barring those days when either was away on a mission, he would meet with Naruto for lunch at Ichiraku Ramen. The first time had been strange. It was the day he returned. He had sat on the stool, Naruto beside him, in a daze. It felt unreal. Was he dreaming? Reliving a memory? Everything was the same as he remembered it. The faded menu on the wall, the man cooking the noodles, the old barstools with their cracked leather covering, Naruto. It was all the just like it was before. And he felt terribly out of place. He wasn't the same. Sasuke had changed while he was gone. Thirteen to sixteen was a big jump, and he had grown while he was away from the village. He had developed under the tutalage of an evil madman. He had realized that he didn't want to be that man, didn't want to give his body up. He wanted to defeat Itachi himself, to feel his brother's blood on his hands. He wanted to restore his clan. He wanted his friend back. He had been a missing-nin and now had returned as a vastly overqualified gennin. His goals may have remained constant, but Sasuke was _different _somehow. The overwhelming sameness bothered him. He found himself wondering if time had stopped when he left, if Naruto had been asleep all this time and was telling Tsunade he was finally awake when the Uchiha had come back. As two bowls of steaming noodles were placed in front of them, Sasuke decided it was time to speak to the blond who had not said a word since he had proposed getting ramen.

"Naruto, I-"

"If you leave again, I won't chase after you to bring you back," Naruto glared at him, his blue eyes cold and hard, "I _will_ kill you." And Sasuke believed it. He had to bite back the reply of _Like you could kill me, dobe_. when vivid images of the blond surrounded by that horrifying red chakra assaulted his mind. His fingers tingled again. Naruto had changed too.

"I'm back," he said instead, calmly and confidently. Naruto smiled widely as if he hadn't just threatened his newly returned friend, and dove into his ramen. Sasuke didn't eat. He watched the blond. Then he watched the noodle man cook. Back to the blond again, happily munching away. His fingers continued to tingle terribly. He sighed.

"Naruto... I-" The other boy lifted his hand to stop him, not even looking up from his meal.

"Not today, teme. Later. Today we're eating ramen together and celebrating the fact that you stopped being such an _usurakontachi_," he stressed the word Sasuke had used in reference to him so many times, "and came back where you belong."

"Hn. Dobe." He didn't even try to hide his tiny smile as he started eating too.

Later didn't come for 8 months. It was a Tuesday afternoon. Sasuke was walking up to the ramen stand when he noticed that his friend was not sitting at his usual spot but was standing outside leaning on the wall. The pale boy raised an eyebrow as he approached.

"The Chunnin exam is coming, teme."

"I'm aware, dobe." Naruto pushed away from the wall and began walking away.

"So let's go." Sasuke stood confused for half a moment before following. Soon he found himself on the familiar path to their old training ground. He stood there and looked at the three wooden poles for a moment. That was where it all really started. He had given up his lunch despite the risks. He had accepted Naruto and his annoying loudness and clumsiness as part of his team and passed Kakashi's exam. That acceptance was what made him a ninja. No one else had ever passed before. _The three of us are one._ And he had meant it. But he had left. Sakura was working in the hospital. He barely ever saw her, and when he did, there was this look in her eyes that he knew meant she was only being nice for Naruto's sake. What had become of them? What had ripped apart Team 7? _Betrayal,_ his mind supplied.

"What are we doing here, dobe? Not reminiscing I hope. I have better things to do." Naruto scowled.

"Shut up, teme. I didn't bring you here for that."

"Then what?" He watched the blond crouch into a fighting position.

"Let's spar." Sasuke frowned. They had not sparred since he came back. They had not touched at all. The last time Sasuke had touched him... His frown deepened as his fingers tingled.

"No. I have teammates to spar with." Naruto laughed out loud.

"Little Daisuke? That annoying Kaori? They're nowhere near your level, teme." Sasuke smirked.

"She's not as annoying as you, usurakontachi."

"At least I don't run around declaring my undying love for you all the time. Oh Saaasuke-kun! You are sooooo unbeliveably gorgeous! I'm gonna kiss you aaaaall over!" He swayed his hips and put his hand over his heart, batting his eyelashes.

"Hn." Sasuke turned around to leave determined not to let the blond goad him into a fight. He didn't want to spar with him. The memories were too much.

Then Naruto ran around him and punched him hard in the face. Sasuke's eyes widened, and he launched a fist back. The fight was vicious and hard. It felt good for them to fight each other. It felt right. The Uchiha slid into it easily because he _knew _Naruto. He knew where the punches were going and when the clones would come. Just like the demon vessel knew him. They fought with everything they had until there was nothing left, and they lay there spent in the grass in front of the three wooden poles. Sasuke turned his head to look at the other boy who had done the same. There was dirt smudging their cheeks. The edge of his horrid orange jacket had been singed. Their breath was coming in harsh pants.

"Dobe."

"What is it, teme?"

"I almost killed you." He couldn't dodge it anymore, couldn't let it fester inside him any longer.

"But you didn't." Sasuke furrowed his eyebrows. What kind of reply was that?

"I left. I betrayed this village. You forgave me. Why?" Naruto lifted himself up on his elbows and looked down at him.

"You came back." Sasuke lifted himself up too.

"So? Why does that matter? Don't you remember what I _did_ to you?" He noticed Naruto's frown and seemingly unconscious movement of his hand over his chest, "How can you just forgive me like that? You chased after me. You tried to make me stay, and I left you for dead. It shouldn't be that easy!" Naruto continued to frown for a moment before softly shaking his head.

"You came back, Sasuke."

"That's not good enough. You _hated_ me. You should hate me even more now."

"I don't. I didn't. Well, I did, but that was a long time ago." Sasuke laid back down, frustrated. He heard Naruto flop to the ground as well. The sun was setting and the clouds were taking on pink and orange hues. The wind blew gently over them.

"Why not? And don't give me the same answer again, dobe. I know it's not just that."

"I wasn't going to, teme..." There was silence between them for a few minutes. Sasuke was about to ask his question again with more force when Naruto spoke up.

"Do you remember that fight? The one with Haku?" Sasuke thought for a moment.

"Haku?"

"Yeah. The mirrors guy.When we were protecting the bridge builder in the Country of Waves."

"Yes."

"That was when I stopped hating you. Or at least that's when I realized I'd stopped hating you. I passed out, remember?" Sasuke nodded. He remembered that day very clearly.

"When I woke up, you were in front of me. Haku said you jumped in front of the trap. You _saved _me, Sasuke. You saved me, and then I thought you died. I watched you die right there in my arms. Do you remember what you said?" He frowned.

"I said that I hated you."

"Yeah. And I said that I hated you too. I said that I hated you, and then I started crying because I didn't hate you anymore. I was so sad Sasuke. I was so sad because you were dead. And you died protecting me."

"My body moved on it's own."

"Yeah. You said that too." The brunette's frown deepened.

"I didn't want your tears."

"I didn't want to give them to you, teme. They came on their own." A few birds flew across the sky above them.

"How did Kakashi beat that guy, dobe?" Naruto laughed somewhat bitterly.

"Kakashi didn't beat him. I did." Sasuke sat up.

"Stop lying, usurakontachi." Naruto continued staring up at the sky.

"I'm not lying, teme. I beat him. There's not many people in the world that really matter to me, not many that care about me. You know that I've been alone. You know how that feels."

"Yes," he replied without hesitation. He knew exactly how that felt.

"At that time, there was only Iruka-sensei. He was like a dad almost, or a really nice uncle. That was the only person who had acknowledged me. Everyone else just hated me, even you. But you were different. You were _Sasuke_. You were the closest thing to a friend I had, and he killed you. I thought you were dead there in my arms. I felt something I'd never ever felt before. I wanted to _destroy _Haku. I wanted to rip him into pieces for what he did. And then something I thought was impossible happened." Sasuke's eyes widened slightly.

"Kyuubi."

"Yeah. Kyuubi. It was the very first time. I shattered his mirrors."

"Shattered?"

"Yup. Almost killed him. Only stopped because he jumped in front of Kakashi's attack to save Zabuza. I was only twelve. I had never killed anybody. But I would have. I wanted to because of what he did to you." Sasuke looked down at him for a while. The sun continued its slow descent on the horizon. The silence felt good and comfortable.

"Teme?"

"Hn."

"Can I ask you something?" Black eyes watched as he continued to stare at the sky.

"Why did you-" Sasuke let out a heavy sigh.

"I left because I needed more power. How could I expect to defeat Itachi when-" Naruto shot up and slammed his fist into the ground leaving a divot.

"God damn it, you stupid bastard! Let me finish my goddamn question! I already know why you left, and honestly I don't even care anymore! I wanna know why you came back, teme!" Sasuke stared quietly into big blue eyes for a moment. _What should I say?_

"Answer me! Why?"

"I stopped hating you that day too." Naruto nodded, his glare demanding he continue.

"You had Iruka, dobe. And Kakashi too, for whatever that's worth. But who did I have?"

"You had me, teme. You'll always have me. We're friends, right?" Part of the Uchiha was pleased at the slight pleading tone in his voice.

"Yes," he said with a firm nod, "so I came back." Naruto smiled brightly, and Sasuke refused to allow the small grin that pulled at his lips. He felt stupid telling him, but it needed to be said. Sasuke came back because all he had was Naruto, and he knew that all the blond had was him.

"You're team's coming to find you."

"I know."

"Oi! Kanami, Kaori, Daisuke! We're over here!" The three over them hurried over.

"Where were you, my sweet Sasuke-kun?"

"Here."

"Let's all go for ramen! I'm hungry because I skipped my lunch to help train the teme. It'll be Uchiha's treat!" He pumped a fist in the air and jumped up. Sasuke frowned but got up and followed the four of them to the ramen stand.

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**A/N:** Well, there you have it. I know that this first chapter is a _bit_ chliche in the world of SasuNaru fiction, but trust me when I say that there is definately more to this story. It will continue on until both men are probably in their late 20's/ early 30's. Once again if you want to help me out by betaing, please let me know. Expect the next chapter soon since it's already written. Please let me know whether or not you liked it by clicking that little review button.

THANKS!


	2. Chapter 2

Not a single review? Ouch. I hope you all like this chapter better anyway.

**Warnings and Disclaimer:** See chapter 1

The two boys sparred together almost every day for the next month except those that Naruto was away on missions for. Sasuke didn't really need it to pass the exam. If he had stayed, he probably would have been a jounin already. But it felt good to fight at his full potential and push himself. He knew that the fights at the exam stadium could be difficult and felt that the extra practice would be good for him. Plus he enjoyed sparring with the blond. He hadn't realized how much he missed it while he was gone. He also worked with his team every day. He knew the exam began in groups of three, and he wanted them to be ready. Daisuke improved immensely on ninjutsu, and Kaori's strength and taijitsu was getting much better. Kanami was extremely proud. She told Sasuke he would make an excellent teacher. He had only scowled in response. The first test was passed easily, it was the same one Sasuke had gotten four years earlier, and he had prepared his team for it. The second exam was similar to his previous one as well except in a different training area. Glad to be away from the memory ridden Forest of Death, they encountered very few problems and were the fifth team to arrive at designated area, scrolls in hand. The summoning spell produced an excited Naruto. He danced around in a circle.

"Go Team Kanami!" He double high fived and then hugged Kaori, who squealed happily. Then he did a quick spinning turn and snatched Daisuke into a hug as well.

"Whoohoo! You guys were fast!" He let go of the blushing red head and turned to Sasuke. There was a brief moment of hesitation. _Is he going to hug me? Do I want him to? _Before the blond punched him hard in the arm.

"Bet the teme was bitching the whole time, huh?" Sasuke smirked. He decided a punch was much better than a hug. He knew what to do when he was punched. Naruto was on the ground laughing, hand behind his head, a moment later.

Sasuke placed first in the final exam, as most expected he would. There were a few boos and heckles from the audience, some still didn't trust him, but they were drowned out by loud cheers of "Kick his ass, teme!" In the end only Sasuke, two kids from the Village Hidden in the Mist, and one from the Grass Village made it to Chunin. It was a great relief to finally move up, and the brunette was actually looking forward to the prospect of being sent on a mission right away. He pondered whether or not they would assign him missions with Naruto. Maybe Sakura would be placed as their medical nin. It would be just like old times. He decided to ask his friend the next day when they met for ramen. But to his surprise, Naruto wasn't there. He wasn't there the following Friday either. He concluded that the blond was on a long mission. After another week, he found himself missing him. He did not like the feeling at all. He had become very familiar with it during the time he was with Orochimaru. It annoyed him not to have the blond around, and his first two weeks of being chunin were spent in a bad mood. He still went Ichiraku's when he was supposed to meet Naruto just in case, and ate the noodles angrily. He was mad both at himself for coming and at Naruto for not showing up. _I don't even like ramen._

It had been two and a half weeks in the middle of the night when he felt the jounin move to change shifts as he made himself some tea in the kitchen. He couldn't sleep again. Insomnia was part of being an Uchiha. They all had nightmares. He could remember being woken up by one of his family members' shouts many times. As the new guard got closer to the house and the old got further away, he recognized the chakra.

"Naruto?" The blond walked into his kitchen. Sasuke could instantly tell that wherever the blond had been, he was glad not to be there anymore. There was something in his blue eyes that he couldn't place. Something bad must of happened. Or maybe something good. He really wasn't sure. But it was something very important. Naruto leaned against the counter across from Sasuke.

"I'm a jounin." The brunette placed his tea down quickly.

"What?"

"I'm a jounin. That's where I've been. They didn't tell me it was coming. I was at home, asleep, and then bam! I was taking the exam."

"What was the exam?"

"A mission." Sasuke raised an eyebrow.

"I can't tell you. Sworn to secrecy and all that." He crossed his pale arms and frowned.

"I suppose you're happy. I made chunin. You made jounin. You're winning." Naruto gave a small half hearted grin and shrugged. Sasuke narrowed his eyes.

"What's wrong, dobe?"

"I'm glad you weren't there, teme. I wouldn't have wanted you to see that." The Uchiha sneered.

"I can handle anything they throw at me, dobe." He was surprised by the intensity of the blue eyes that snapped up at him.

"No. I wouldn't have wanted you to see _me _like that." Sasuke straightened up and stared at him, leaving his unasked question in the air. _What happened?_

"Sorry, Sasuke. I can't talk about it. And I really don't want to ever think about it again. So let's just let it go, okay?" He smiled brightly, and the brunette glared at the emptiness behind it.

"Hn. Tea, dobe?" Naruto scratched at the back of his head.

"Yeah."

For the next year Naruto was assigned the overnight shift of Uchiha Babysitting, as the jounin had come to call it despite the vicious death glares they all got when Sasuke found out, almost every night. The brunette was surprised when he only feigned annoyance at not having more serious missions for the first month and gave up even that soon after. They talked aimably some nights, drank tea in silence others. Occasionally, Sasuke would awaken covered in a fine sheen of sweat to Naruto leaning over him having shaken him out of his nightmares. He never asked what images were haunting his best friend, but the look on his face practically demanded an answer.

"Itachi." Always in a small whisper, never anything more. Once in a while, when echoes of his brother's cold voice and the sight of his parent's bodies behind his closed eyes prevented him from returning to sleep, the two of them would sit on the roof together and look out over the Uchiha compound.

"I get nightmares sometimes too, teme." That night the air was warm and heavy. The waning moon cast light on the two of them as it moved from behind a few stray clouds. Sasuke raised an eyebrow.

"I do! I always have. They've been coming less and less now though. I think it's 'cause I'm sleeping during the day. The sunlight chases them away or something." He grinned and scrunched up his nose.

"Hn." They sat watching the horizon for a long time. Sasuke tried not to think about the empty houses around them, the empty house they sat on. He was the only Uchiha left in a place that had once held many. He was the only Uchiha left anywhere, besides his murdering bastard of a brother. He sighed and picked at a scratch he had gotten earlier that day from training. The pain didn't distract him though, and quite suddenly the normally welcoming silence was becoming sinister. It felt like the oppresive stillness after Itachi had left him with the corpses of his entire family and he hadn't been able to fill it with sobs anymore. That terrible quiet would never leave him. He needed noise, anything to fill the empty void that was pulling him back into his memories. He looked toward Naruto.

"What do you dream about, dobe?" The blond looked over surprised.

"You mean my nightmares?" Sasuke shrugged. Naruto turned back toward the horizon.

"A lot of the time, I dream about being alone. But not just the regular kind of alone. I live with that when I'm awake. It's the kind of alone where I'm in the middle of the village and there are people everywhere, but they don't see me. They don't notice no matter what I do. I yell and scream and even try pushing them, but I never get a reaction. There are people I know there, Shikamaru, Kakashi-sensei, Iruka-sensei, Sakura, everybody. But no one can see me at all. They look right through me. It's like I'm invisible. I hate those dreams." He shook his head.

"Are they really that bad?"

"Yeah, they are. But recently they've gotten better." Sasuke waited for him to continue. A small blush appeared on his whiskered cheeks.

"Since you came back..." He paused before continuing more sure of himself, blush fading. "Since you came back, after everyone ignores me, and I can't take it anymore, I run down to the river. You're always there sitting on the dock. I run up behind you, and you turn around. You _look_ at me, Sasuke. You can see me. You never talk at all. You just look at me for a second and then turn back around. Sometimes I just stay standing there, and you ignore me. Sometimes I sit down next to you, and you ignore me. And once, you patted the dock next to you when I didn't come right away. It doesn't matter that you never look at me or talk to me again because when you did, you _saw_ me. And that makes the nightmares not so bad."

"Hn." There was a warm feeling in the Sharingan user's chest, and he chose to dismiss it. Naruto grinned again. They watched as the sun's rays started to lighten the sky. Slowly, the light spread as the sun rose. The moon and the stars and the blackness of the night faded away. Birds began singing in the trees around them; a soft wind finally broke the heavy stagnation of air that had hung around them all night. The blond jumped to his feet suddenly and put his hands on his hips in a very Gai-like pose.

"Today's gonna be a great day, teme! I can tell."

"Can you, usurakontachi?"

"Yeah."

"Hn."

"What time is it?"

"What's the matter, dobe? You don't know?"

"Damnit, teme! Just tell me!" Sasuke looked out at the horizon.

"I would say it's 5:45."

"Okay. You have fifteen minutes to get ready."

"Ready for what?"

"The jounin exam."

"What?" The brunette scrambled quickly to his feet.

"Your exam starts in fifteen minutes at the front gate. I was supposed to tell you when you had ten minutes to get there, but I'm giving you a head start."

"You let me stay up half the night knowing I had this exam? What were you thinking, dobe?" Sasuke fumed, his hands in fists at his sides.

"Whatever, teme. I know you better than anybody.You wouldn't have been able to go back to sleep anyway." The Uchiha hurried downstairs ignoring the blond. He was right. Sleep wouldn't have come no matter how hard he tried. He quickly dressed and packed his weapons and supplies. He was stopped from bursting through the front door by Naruto. They looked at each other for a moment.

"You're going to pass."

"I know." The blond placed a hand on his shoulder. Black eyes darted to it. They had never shared a comforting gesture like that before. He struggled to keep from squirming. Uchiha Sasuke did _not_ squirm. He looked back to Naruto.

"I'll be here when you get back. We'll get some sushi or something since we're always eating ramen."

"Okay." He almost winced at the quietness of his voice. The grip on his shoulder tightened for a moment before pulling away.

"You're gonna be late." Sasuke smirked.

"Hn." And he was out the door.

When he arrived at the designated spot, he found a shock of silver hair and an obscured face leaning against a post staring down at a small orange book.

"You're three minutes early, Sasuke."

"You're on time for a change." The book snapped closed and disappeared into the man's green vest. His eye roved over the younger man. They hadn't really talked at all since his return. They looked at each other, and an awkward silence settled. Sasuke could feel the thoughts behind his appraising glare. _Have you really changed at all?_ He wondered if his former teacher would ask out loud as well as how he would respond. _More than you know._ Their nonverbal exchange was inturrupted by the appearence of the other participants in the exam. Rock Lee showed up in a flurry of movement. He skidded to a stop in front of Kakashi.

"Ah, my sensei's eternal rival. I am glad to have such a capable jounin administering my exam." He turned quickly on his heel. "And Sasuke, I am glad to see you here as well!" The green clad teen gave him a big thumbs up and flashed a smile.

"Lee." He nodded in reply. Moments later a nearly breathless Hyuuga Hinata arrived as well.

"Hinata-san! Will you be joining us on this momentous step up to jounin?" She lifted her head from leaning over with her hands on her knees.

"Y-yes, Lee-san. Good morning Uchiha-san and Kakashi-san."

"Sasuke is fine." Kaskashi glanced over at him, his visible eye widened in surprise.

"Let's go." The older man darted out the gates, the three examees on his heels. They moved quickly for two hours before abruptly stopping in a clearing far from the village. Kaskashi sat down on a log. Lee and Hinata sat in front of him. Sasuke leaned on a tree nearby.

"This test is a mission," he began without preamble, "It is different than the missions you have been on before. It is A rank and requires that we eliminate a group of rouge ninjas from the Village Hidden in the Sand that have been terrorizing travelers recently. That doesn't mean capture. It means _eliminate_. At that time we will send out a message and stay with the bodies until a sand ninja comes to claim them." There was silence for a moment before the Copy Nin continued.

"In order to progress to the rank of Jounin, you must have the capability to destroy your enemies without hesitation. A ninja of this level _must_ be able to kill." He looked at Hinata and Lee as he said this. " There is a possibility that all of you will pass or none of you. Last year only one of the examees made it." His gaze turned to Sasuke. "His team was in danger, so he destroyed the enemy. All thirty of them. By himself."

Sasuke felt his chest tighten. Images of Konoha's newest jounin flashed in his mind. _I didn't want you to see_ me_ like that. _He imagined a feral look on his face, blue eyes turned red, Kyuubi's chakra flaring around him, around the corpses that lay before him. The empty smile he wore that night, the eyes he couldn't read before suddenly were very clear. _ I took many lives today._ Sasuke's fingers fluttered to his shoulder where Naruto's hand had been. _You're going to pass._ He knew he would. All he had to do was kill someone.

**A/N: **Okay. Please shoot me a review and tell me what you think. I'm still in search of a beta...


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